A Blackmailing Christmas
by ChicGeek
Summary: It's almost Christmas. Rhonda knows Helga's secret. She blackmails Helga into doing her chores, shopping, etc., until Helga rebels. Now Rhonda is going to tell the whole school at the winter concert. R/R please!
1. Overheard

Hey everybody! Nice to see all of you gorgeous people out there again.......This is my first HA fic, and I thought of it right after watching Alias. Since people don't read the summary, the story is basically Rhonda finds out Helga likes Arnold, and she blackmails Helga into different things (chores, Christmas shopping, etc.). Eventually, Helga rebels, and Rhonda threatens that during the holiday concert, she's going to tell everyone her secret, and Helga has to stop her. Will she???Hmmmmmm.....this is in Helga's POV.  
  
I don't own Hey Arnold, If I did, I'd draw Lila out of the picture.  
  
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I, Helga G. Pataki, hate that prissy little rich girl, Rhonda Wellington Lloyd.  
  
Maybe not hate. Strongly dislike, that's better. I have many little reasons, like her constant bragging, her constant globe-trotting, and her constant snootiness. But I have one very large, super-duper, supersized reason why I hate that queen of of all that glitters and gleams.  
  
And here it is.  
  
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It was lunchtime. The cafeteria was decorated in that corny, school-y way. The construction paper Christmas trees, the "Happy Holidays!" banners, the paper snowflkes, stuck to the window, with glue oozing out the sides. All of that.As you can tell, it was nearing Christmas. I was currently eating lunch with Pheobe.  
  
"Pheobe." I asked my best friend. "Do you like anyone?"  
  
Pheobe blushed one hundred shades of red and stammered, "N-no, Helga! No w-way!"  
  
I only asked it because I was bored. Everyone knows she and Tall Hair Boy are an item. But whatever.  
  
"'Kay Pheebs." I commented.  
  
And there he was.  
  
Darn, that boy is gorgeous. I swear. Arnold is the most handsome boy in all of America. At that moment he was reaching for some tapioca pudding. (A/N have you noticed in HA, it's always either tapioca, or jello?)  
  
For once, I did'nt move. I just watched.  
  
Pheobe shot me a knowing glance. She's the only one who knows about Arnold, and she's quite handy to have for planning schemes.  
  
As Arnold strode towards my lunch table, I felt my mouth opening. "No!" I thought. "I won't say anything!"  
  
Too late.  
  
"Hey football head!" I called out. "Tapioca again?"  
  
Arnold rolled his eyes, and ignored me.  
  
"HEY!" I stepped in front of him. "Hey football head, look up."  
  
Puzzled, he did.  
  
I flicked my finger under his nose and up. Startled, he dropped his lunch tray with a loud bang. All of the food splattered all over his pants. Silently, he bent down, and picked up the tray. Oh, I was screaming inside. He glared at me, and walked over to Gerald, Stinky, and Sid's table.  
  
Quickly, I scurrried out of the cafeteria, and into the hallway. Leaning against a locker, I pulled out my heart locket.  
  
"Oh Arnold!" I began "Why must I torment you? Can't you see It's just my pathetic cry for help? Can't you see it's you I adore?"  
  
I glanced into the lunchroom. Arnold was laughing at something Lila had said.   
  
I felt the anger boil up indide my heart.  
  
I fumed. "Instead you choose to be with HER, she who does not return your affections, oh my Arn-"  
  
I sensed someone behind me. I whirled around, expectind to see my wheezing friend. I cocked my arm back as I turned and-  
  
There she was.  
  
Rhonda was standing behind me.  
  
Smirking.  
  
Staring at my locket.  
  
Rhonda Wellington Lilyod was looking at my locket.  
  
And the reality sank in.  
  
Rhonda had heard everything I said.  
  
  
  
Hehhehe, I leave you with a cliffhanger. What will happen? Ya know that winter storm everyones talking about, on the weather channel, the one that hit the East Coast? Well, I live in Northern Virginia, (Alsmost in DC) and I'm having a snow day!! Woo! so if I have time, I'll write some more chapters. We'll see. That was really short, and not that good, I know....but....sigh. 


	2. The Beginning of the End

Chapter twooooooooooooooooooooooo!  
  
I don't own Hey Arnold. Or maybe I do. Maybe I own HA in a parallel universe. Yeah.  
  
  
  
I slowly backed away from Rhonda. She smirked.  
  
"So! Little Helga has been covering up her feelings all this time! This is interesting!" she quipped.  
  
Beads of sweat gathered on my forehead. On an impulse I rushed foreward, and started to grab Rhonda's shirt. "You little..." Instead of yelling, she smiled sweetly.  
  
I let go fast, as if I had been burned.  
  
"Helga, Helga." she said. "You would'nt want the school to know, would you?"   
  
I raised an eyebrow. Or, my eybrow, rather. I really need some tweezers...  
  
She continued. "If you attack me again, I could just let your little secret out....hmmmm?"   
  
I shuddered.  
  
"I'll make a deal, Helga."  
  
She stuck out her hand.  
  
"If you do whatever I tell you for five months, I won't tell."  
  
I was so close to jumping on her. I felt like a caged animal gone insane. I dug my toes into my shoe, and clutched the ends of my dress.  
  
Rhonda's smile flickered. "Oh Ahhhhhrrnol-" I cut her off, and stuck out my hand.  
  
She shook it.  
  
"Ciao, Doll!" she yelled, while trotting down the hall.  
  
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Later that night, Bob, Miriam, and Olga (who was home for the holidays. Uck.) All stood around their recently finished christmas tree.  
  
"Oh Daddy!" Olga chirped. "It's beautiful! All our hard work has paid off!"  
  
Bob grinned. "Eeeeee-yup! But Olga, you really did help us with this! I mean, what other kid could whip up an angel outta newspaper, tape, and old socks? Yeah!"  
  
I rolled my eyes. Personally, I love Christmas. But Olga....makes it a soap opera. Or a bad sitcom.  
  
"Oooooh.....Ooooolga, we're just soooo happy you're heeeereee..." Miriam said, in a that lazy way of hers, drawing out the vowels.  
  
Gosh. They can be so....perfect. I would much rather be watching Wrestlemania, and I know my dad would too. Oh, wait! No, he would'nt! Why? Oh, his darling firstborn is here! Yes, and the world is a happy, lovely place, and the trees are made of candy, and every boy with a football-shaped head loves every girl with a big pink bow!  
  
Ha. I wish.  
  
I flopped onto my bed. "Rrrrrrhondaaa-aa-aa-aa....." I bleated out, like a sheep.  
  
The reality suddenly sunk in. What the heck was Rhonda going to make me do? Chores? Homework? Man.....This was annoying.  
  
I rolled over onto my side. There was only one thing that would calm me down now....  
  
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(A/N Wait! can you guess what it is!??)  
  
(oh, whatever!)  
  
The feathers on my headress flopped onto the page of my notebook. "Oh, Arnold...The love of my dreams. Your hair is like the morning sunrise, your eyes like the sea, your teeth-"  
  
Waitaminit! Teeth? That's just plain weird.  
  
I sat in front of my Arnold shrine. "Ohhhhh.....Arnold. Will you ever be mine? You will see through Lila's devious disguise eventually...and realize that I! Helga! That I am your TRUE love!" I yelled the last words, and jumped into the air as I said them. My foot caught onto my closet door, and my headress flopped onto my eyes. my telephone came down with me, and the cord snaked around my head.  
  
Miriam opened the door.  
  
I glared at her. She left.  
  
-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:NEXT DAY-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:  
  
I slowly walked into the classroom, scanning for signs of Rhonda. Mr Simmons wasn't there yet. I looked over to Pheobe. She shot me a glance, eyes wide.  
  
Uh oh.  
  
Rhonda was heading towards me, with a stack of papers.  
  
She dropped them on my desk.  
  
"Heeeeeeelgah!" she said shortly. "This is my homework. And a list of the things I must go out to buy for Christmas. And a list of my various pets, and the care and keeping of them. I expect you to be at my house no later than three thirty today!"  
  
My jaw hit the floor I'm sure. Who did she think was?  
  
"Rhonda, You....Do you really think I'm going to do your dirty work??!!!"  
  
"Uh, uh, uh, Helga! You would'nt want your seeeeeeeeecret out!" hissed Rhonda.  
  
The whole class leaned towards where I stood.  
  
"Awright...Rhonda....Fine....If you...." I growled through my clamped-shut teeth.  
  
Mr. Simmons walked into the classroom. "Who's ready to do some very special learning today??"  
  
Rhonda was, that was for sure.  
  
-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-: OUTSIDE RHONDA's HOUSE-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:  
  
Wow. Rhonda's house was quite the shack. It was a gleaming white town house, with three balconies, each holding back an avalanche of flowers.  
  
I catiously knocked on the door.  
  
Rhonda swept the door open, and ushered me in. "Helga! Oh, you should get right to work! I know Arnold's phone number!"  
  
"Alright!" I yelled. She led me up her sweeping, spiral staircase, past french paintings, and tennis trophies, and greek statues. She stopped in front of a light blue door, and flung it open. I gasped.  
  
Amidst the huge dollhouse, walk-in closet, super chi-chi decorations, and the canopy bed, sat at least 14 cats.  
  
This was going to be a fun day.   
  
I'm so sorry it took me so long to update....REVIEW!!! i know it was shoooort.......... 


	3. Opportunity Silenced

Thank you EVERYONE for all the positive reviews! I love you all!  
  
Let's get on with the show...I'll try to make this chapter longer than the last one.  
  
  
The door behind me swung open, revealing a middle aged man. "Ugh..." I thought. He was head to toe in Armani, with his hair slicked back. A woman, clad in a long, Prada dress, lolled on his arm. It was obscene, how covered in diamonds she was.  
  
"Rrrrrrrrhonda, doll. Your Father and I are meeting the VonSnatt's car outside! We'll be home around midnight!" sang Rhonda's mother. She seemed to over dramaticize every word. Like we were in a soap opera. She also seemed to be looking me up and down, with a pinched frown on her face. Hey, was Nadine with her bugs so much better than me?  
  
"Have fun with your friend dear! Er....what's your name?" drawled her father  
  
"Why would you care?" I asked sweetly.  
  
"Er...what was that?" asked her father. I glowered. "Nothing...". They left in a swoosh of velvet and silk. I looked out the window, and saw them running to fire-red, snazzy convertible. Nice.  
  
"Helga!" Snapped Rhonda. "Get to work! These are my fifteen cats, Snowy, Whitey, Blackie, Fluffernutter, Yum-Yum, Cutie, Molly, Prissy, Lady...  
  
"Awful, Yucky, Ugly...." I thought.  
  
".....and Cottonball." finished Rhonda. "Every day, each of them needs to be fed, groomed, excercized, and talked to. You feed them Prissy Kitty MOIST cat food, in a martini glass. It MUST be the tuna flavor. You need to brush each of them, except Blackie, one hundred times a day. They need a bath every other day. The litter boxes have to be emptied every six hours. You simply MUST walk them every five hours. You must bring them to the backyard, and let them play. Finally, you must talk to them for one hour, every day! Got that?"  
  
I blinked.   
  
Rhonda raised her eyes heavenward, and let out her breath in a sigh. "Fine."  
  
"Rhonda?" I asked, with a little sarcasm dripping on my words.  
  
"Yes, Helga?"  
  
"How am I going to, say, walk your cats every five hours. Because if you think that I'm going to stay after school for five hours, you've got another thing coming, princess!" I glared at her, and put my hands on my hips.  
  
Again, Rhonda sighed. "Fine! You only have to stay two hours after school, and three on the weekends! After school, one hour will be for my cats, and the other hour for my chores and homework. On the weekends, One hour to my cats, and the remaining two hours to helping me shop."  
  
"Helping you SHOP!??" I yelled.  
  
Now Rhonda blinked. "You will accompany me to carry my packages."  
  
There was no use arguing. I shrugged my shoulders.  
  
"Alright, Helga." Rhonda pointed a manicured finger at me. "Tomorrow is Saturday. You BETTER be here by ONE PM." She jabbed her finger at me to puncutate.   
  
I crossed my arms and sneered at her. There was no use trying to get out of this one. But five months of this...Oh well. I was'nt doing anything else, anyway.....  
  
I turned sharply on my heel, and left.  
  
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The next morning, I was sitting at the kitchen table, chewing on Super-Sugar Blasto Puffs. Miriam was asleep on the couch, with the TV blaring, and Bob was still asleep. Wait! No, we were not! For once, Everyone acted normal, and sat around the kitchen table, gnawing on a buffet on pancakes, blueberry muffins, bacon, scrambled eggs, and sausages.  
  
Olga was still here.   
  
And she was still in the kitchen.  
  
"Haven't had food this great since college!" growled Bob. "Yesss Honey, It'sss reallly gooood...." lazed Miriam. I just sat like a statue in my place, stiffly chewing a blueberry muffin.  
  
Olga swept out of the kitchen, already perfectly dressed, make-upped, combed, washed and dried. Since six in the morning. "Ooooh Mummy! Daddy! Thank you soooo much! It's just soooo great being here for Christmas!"  
  
"And I'm soooo going to throw up!" I muttered under my breath.  
  
The sudden jerk of Olga's arm around my neck came. She was cuddling my...face. "And you toooo baby sister! I just love being with you! Your idea of me teaching underpriveleged inuit children was the best! How's the breakfast? You seem quiet!"  
  
Wow. That was one of the longest running sentences I had ever heard. Every word seemed to have an exclamation mark.  
  
  
But, it was time to go to school, thank goodness. I grabbed my coat and lunchbox, and stomped out the door. "Bye, everyone!" I called sweetly behind me, Olga-style.   
  
It was snowing pretty hard. Big, downy wet flakes were slowly coming down towards earth. It was kind of pretty, in a wet, cold sort of way. Very Christmas-like.  
  
The school loomed up in front of me. There were a few small snowball wars going on. the bell obviously hadn't rung.   
  
SMACK! A snowball whapped the side of my head, dripping the cold, crystal flakes slowly down my neck. I whirled around to see who it was. A grinning Wolfgang stood behind me, tossing another snowball into the air, and catching it.  
  
"Oh noooo! Little girl not gonna cry is she? Waaaah waaah! Little bitty fourth grader!" Wolfgang whined. His gum-chewing friend stood behind him, tapping his shoulder. "Uuuuuhh, Wolfgang, that's not such a-" Wolfgang shoved him off. "Shut up!" he growled.  
  
So of course, being me, I had to take advantage of this sudden distraction.  
  
I charged at Wolfgang, and knocked him, and his friend into an empty trash can. "Wha-" he stuttered.  
  
"Nighty-night!" I said, before shoving snow on both their faces.  
  
The bell rang.  
  
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"Boys and girls! I have a super-special surprise for everyone!" chirped the cheerful Mr.Simmons.   
  
Oh, boy.  
  
"The school wants to do something for the holidays, so..."  
  
Whoop-dee-doo.  
  
"We're going to put on a holiday pageant! Isn't that special? It'll have skits, songs, and a lot of other stuff, all written by our own class! We'll feature Kwanzaa, Christmas, and Hannukah!"  
  
Always politically correct, huh Mr.Simmons?  
  
The class was moderately excited. Buzzing about costumes, skits, and the like were discussed. Mr. Simmons looked pleased.  
  
"If you're interested, please see me in the auditorium, after school. We'll have auditions, and idea proposals."  
  
"But Mr. Simmons?" asked Stinky "How'll we audition with no lines?"  
  
"Hmmmm." hummed Mr. Simmons. He popped his finger into the air.  
  
"I've got it! If you are interested in writing for the pageant, please see me after school!"  
  
Hmmm. That piqued my interest. Writing IS one of my natural talents after all. I could probably come up with a few ideas, and maybe even be IN the pageant, too. It could be ok. It's not like I have anything better to do.  
  
Wait a minute. That sounded familiar.   
  
Oh, crap! Rhonda!  
  
I swiveled around in my chair to glance at her. She glared. I threw a glare right back. She shook her head no.   
  
Oh, was she gonna get it.  
  
-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-  
  
AFTER SCHOOL, AT RHONDA'S  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Brush.  
  
Bru-ROOOOOOOOOOOOWR!! Scratch, scratch.  
  
I hate Yum-Yum. I make one mistake in brushing, and she practically kills me.   
  
  
Yeah, this was fun. I had already emptied the litter boxes, and taken them all out for a walk. I had almost finished brushing all of them. Just 76 more strokes on Yum-Yum the devil cat. Then, i could go home. Wait! No! Then it's time to do Rhonda's chores. Luckily, Mr. Simmons gave no homework.   
  
I brushed Yuck-Yuck a few more times, until she attacked again.  
  
"Screw you, cat." I had better things to do.   
  
Suddenly, Rhonda whirled into the room. She was painting her fingernails, and each one shone like a miniature sun. "Done with the cats Helga?" she drawled. "Well, time for chores. I need you to clean up my room. Hop, get to it!"  
  
I silently trodded up to her room. Luckily, nothing feline followed me.  
  
I creaked open the door. "Pheeeew..." i sighed. Her room wasn't too bad. At least it wouldn't be too hard.  
  
I picked a few books up, and set them back on the shelves, put stuffed animals back on shelves, stuff like that. Boring, but not backbreaking. I had a feeling that would be the key for the next few months. I was just dreading the weekends.  
  
As I opened the drawer of her desk to put away a calculator, something caught my eye. A ordinary piece of paper, with scribbles on it. I don't know what I noticed about it right away, but I am sure glad I did.   
  
I fingered the edges of the paper, and my mouth split into a wide grin.  
  
This was too good.  
  
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So, better? Sorry it took so long. Cliffhanger, cliffhanger! Hahahahaha! More reviews, and I will write faster, I promise! 


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